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Boobs on Your Tube: Shondaland’s Bisexual Firefighter and Dr. Orgasm Are The Crossover Queer Romance You’ve Waited For

Hello! Welcome to a VERY exciting edition of your weekly television round up, Boobs on Your Tube! This week, wow Batwoman navigated some bisexual vampires. SUPERGIRL CELEBRATED ONE HUNDRED EPISODES by sending Kara and Lena through space and time! Vanderpump Rules also got mighty bisexual which means that noted Bravo television fanatic Kayla really got to strut her stuff for our dear website. Caity Lotz made her directing debut on Legends of Tomorrow while Ava fought Genghis Khan (this show!!). Alice has a new hook-up and new stand-up material on Good Trouble. Archie’s mom came out as a late-in-life gay on Riverdale! Queer Molly Ringwald for everybody! I’m Not Okay With This has an angsty lesbian who telekinetically gives her crush’s boyfriend a nosebleed, so we assume you’re gonna want to watch.

Riese also really covered that L Word beat this week: Here’s an absolutely marvelous in-depth interview with Generation Q costume designer Dierdra Govan and style thief shopping guide to Alice’s jumpsuits to match!! And she also covered the OG’s episode 309 with Carly for the podcast.

Notes from the TV Team: 

+ Time got away from me this week, so look for that Party of Five piece early next week. On the plus side, that gives you the weekend to catch up with the Acosta family so if you haven’t already, do that. I have a lot of feelings about this show and can’t wait to share. — Natalie

+ I really need Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist to add a queer lady because I want us to be able to write about that show so badly. IT’S SO GOOD. It’s like if Glee and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend had a child that somehow grew up to be more well-adjusted than either of them! Just wanted to shout about it. #GiveLaurenGrahamAGirlfriend — Valerie Anne

+ None of us watch The Conners, but I guess Aunt Jackie is in a thruple now? Do with that information what you will.   — Carmen

God Friended Me 214: “Raspberry Pie”

Written by Natalie

Ali and Emily meet.

Have you ever met someone at exactly the wrong moment? Like when you’re just out of a relationship and still nursing those scars? Or you’ve got a project at work or school that’s just consuming you and you don’t have time for anything else? Well, that’s what happens to Ali Finer this week on God Friended Me.

She meets Emily — “Ali and Emily!” I scream in the throes of a horrible PLL flashback — in the waiting room of her fertility specialist. Emily breaks the unwritten rules of waiting rooms and tries to start up a conversation. She’s charming so Ali puts aside her clipboard and introduces herself. They discover that they share a favorite novel and a common acquaintance and that Emily teaches at Ali’s alma mater. They strike up an easy rapport which leads to Emily oversharing about her reasons for freezing her eggs. Though she finds Emily’s candor refreshing, Ali doesn’t return it: instead, she insists that she’s busy figuring her life out too. She does, however, manage to name drop the bar she runs….smooth, Ali, very smooth.

Sure enough, Emily shows up at the bar the next day and asks Ali out on a date. When Ali doesn’t answer right away, Emily assumes she misread the signals but Ali assures her she didn’t. Ali declines the offer, chalking it up to bad timing, and Emily leaves a little heartbroken. Later, Ali backs out of dinner plans with her dad and he tracks her down to talk. She explains what happened and admits she said no to the date, despite thinking Emily was great. She doesn’t want to invite someone into her life just as she’s about to undergo chemo. As is his wont, Papa Pope comes through with some great advice.

“It’s naive to think that your life won’t change a great deal over the coming months, and if you’re not interested in dating right now, well, that’s fine, but just because your life will change doesn’t mean it needs to stop,” he tells her.

The pair run into each other again at the fertility specialist’s office and, this time, Ali tells Emily the truth: about her cancer, about her fear and about the real reason she said no to the date. Emily takes the news in stride and immediately asks Ali out again.

All American 214: “Who Shot Ya”

Written by Natalie

Coop tries to calm her parents' anxiety. It does not work.

This week episode of All American opens with Crenshaw lamenting the loss of another son…though half the people at Tyrone’s homegoing service couldn’t stand him when he was alive…Spencer and his mom are there, Coop and her parents are there and, surprisingly, so is Shawn’s mom. Maybe everybody just came to make sure he was really dead.

Outside the church, Spencer corners Coop. He’s worried that she’s still a suspect in Tyrone’s murder but Coop is remarkably calm about the whole situation. But Spencer is unconvinced: the threat to Coop — from the investigation or from Tyrone’s boys seeking revenge — distracts him from the rehab of his shoulder injury. Mrs. Baker, the newly elected DA, shares Spencer’s concern and urges him to get Coop a good lawyer, quickly…which, thanks to Layla, he manages to do. But Coop doesn’t take kindly to Spencer’s interference and lashes out when her best friend shows up back in Crenshaw. Spencer’s stunned by her reaction; he can’t believe he’s in trouble for trying to protect her.

“No, you’re getting in trouble for creating more problems in my life, trying to hide from your own,” Coop corrects. “Listen, I’ma say this one last time. You do not have to save me, and leave this whole Tyrone thing alone.”

Escaping the pall of Tyrone’s murder isn’t as easy as Coop would like, though: security footage leaks of her carrying a gun near the scene of the murder and a warrant is issued for her arrest. Convinced that turning over the gun to the police will vindicate her, Coop sneaks away from her family and heads to Patience’s house in search of it. Why Coop feels so comfortable believing she can walk into the LAPD with an unlicensed firearm and think she’ll be okay, I don’t know, but, apparently, she’s got more faith in the cops than I do. Patience admits she tossed the gun because she loves her and doesn’t want her to go to prison.

“Look, if that ain’t some Queen and Slim, ride or die type of love, then I don’t know what is. I’ll always love you,” Coop admits, before turning and walking away. I try not to think about how that movie ended.

She meets Spencer in the park for one last hoorah before she turns herself in. He’s pieced together who really killed Tyrone — Shawn’s mother — but Coop has resigned herself to taking the fall. Ultimately, it all comes back to her, Coop surmises, and she won’t force Shawn’s mother to sacrifice another thing. At the station, Shawn’s mother confesses to the murder, realizing she can’t sacrifice another thing either, especially not Coop.

Deputy 109: “10-8 Entitlement”

Written by Natalie

Bishop readies for a fight.

We don’t get to see Bishop reveal their gender identity to their girlfriend, Genevieve; we only get the witness the uncomfortable and disheartening fallout. Bishop’s been exiled from their bedroom, forced to sleep on the couch, while Genevieve locks herself in the bedroom. Before their first day at Majors, Bishop tries to talk to Genevieve but every conversation just leads to another fight.

Bishop asks for understanding from Genevieve — they’re finally being the most authentic version of themselves — but Gen insists that she feels like she doesn’t know Bishop anymore. She asks for more time to process and Bishop gives her space….too much, perhaps, because they spend the entire day ignoring Genevieve’s calls. They meet Gen after work, eager to celebrate their first day, but Genevieve isn’t happy about being ignored. Frustrated, Bishop laments how chaotic things have gotten between them.

“I’m a lesbian,” Genevieve says, as if she’s been holding onto this thought all day. “A woman who likes women. And if you’re not a woman, what does that mean for me? For us?”

Bishop handles the sting of that response better than I do (there was a lot of yelling at my TV). They admit that they don’t know what it means for Genevieve but, for their relationship, there’s the chance for both of them to engage as their whole selves. Without a word, Genevieve turns to head home and Bishop follows close behind. Once they’re in the rideshare, Gen asks if Bishop knew they were non-binary when they moved to LA and they acknowledge that they knew but didn’t have words for it. Bishop insists it doesn’t change how they feel about Genevieve and they’re sure that they can make it work. But, in that moment, Bishop recognizes that her certainty isn’t enough if Genevieve doesn’t share it…and asks the driver to stop the car.

“Just so that we’re clear,” Bishop says, as she climbs out of the car, “I wanted your acceptance, but I did not need your acceptance.”

They finally let their emotions out, on the shoulder of the freeway, as Selena Gomez’s vocals sum up this entire hateful, uncomfortable mess: “I needed to lose you to love me.” But because this show can’t just let Bishop be the star, even of their own story, Sheriff Hollister rides to rescue…and the story ends on what an incredible ally he is, rather than leaving the focus on Bishop, where it belongs.

Nancy Drew 114: “The Sign of the Uninvited Guest”

Written by Valerie Anne

Things are getting spookier by the week in Horseshoe Bay but even in episodes where the focus is more on the larger mysteries than the characters’ side missions, they still find a way to keep the off-screen plates spinning. For example, this episode was mostly a murder mystery dinner party, where the Drew Crew retraced their steps the night of Tiffany’s murder and learned they all may have accidentally had a hand in her death. But we also got a taste of what’s going on in Bess’s life when she gets a text from Amaya asking her to be her +1 at an event, and she’s afraid their relationship is escalating from Mentor/Mentee to something more, which her girlfriend Lisbeth probably wouldn’t like too much.

bess shows george her phone

Queer culture is having to ask your friends if a girl is asking you on a date or not.

Also there was a character called Dominique who was a hacker with an alternative lifestyle haircut. Just a fact I thought you’d appreciate.

I was talking to my friend this week about how much we love Nancy Drew and how unusual it is for me to genuinely like all of the boys on a CW show. There’s no Landon, no Mon-El. No over-worshipped piece of cardboard. There’s Ace, a sweet, gentle soul who has more going on under that floppy head of hair than it seems. And Nick, a good boy with secrets of his own who cares so much about so much. And so I decided to take a peek at the list of episodes on Wikipedia, and lo and behold…there are so many women in this writer’s room! In fact, only one episode this season gives a man solo credit for an ep. And what’s more (more unusual, that is) , many of this season’s DIRECTORS were women, too. Including Sydney Freeland, the Navajo trans woman who directed Her Story. Just when I think I’ve reached peak love for this show, I learn something new about it that makes me love it more.

The Bold Type 406: “To Peg or Not To Peg”

Written by Carmen

A look that screams “boss bitch” if I’ve ever seen it.

I’ve tried to figure out how to even describe The Bold Type this week in terms that aren’t: “Y’all this was a mess.” I even deployed my fellow TV Team members Drew and Natalie on the task. Drew rearranged her day to watch the episode this morning!

And here’s what the three of our great minds, combined together, came up with: “Y’all this was. A. MESS.”

I’ve been trying to process it and clearly I can’t, so here’s a short summary: The bartender from the end of last week asked Kat to peg him this week. That meant Kat needed to buy a strap-on, a task she was less than hype about but Jane and Sutton were all over. Kat buys a rainbow strap-on (this is based on the previous week’s “Next Week On…” because I don’t think we actually see the toy in question this week) with suspenders. She wears it taped to her leg the next day at work to really become one with its energy. Then she tops the bartender. They have lots of intimate eye contact. And the following day at work she tells her friend about it, realizes she’s bisexual, and of course Jane and Sutton hold hands and support her. The end! Happily ever after! We can all go home now!

Except Natalie and I, and given past comments on the website I’ll go on a branch to say a lot of our readers, had already known Kat was bisexual?

Or rather, Kat has always described herself as queer. She dated men before Adena, and never seemed to have a specific crisis or coming-to-understanding about that fact. In fact, she had never referred to herself as a lesbian before last night’s episode? So her “big” bisexual coming-of-age was murky, fell short, and definitely didn’t land for me in the way it feels like the writers intended.

There is definitely a version of last night’s episode that I would have loved. A queer woman of color coming into her top energy by pegging this white dude — it has all kinds of intriguing subversion of expectations baked into it, some of which I wish The Bold Type had explored more. Both Natalie and Drew pointed out is that TBT seems very invested in “shocking” and “breaking sexual norms” this season (including the masturbation/sex party episode, last week’s jump into Kat’s hook ups, and now this) — but they haven’t been focused on underpinning emotional value of those explorations. Pushing boundaries just for the sake of saying you’re doing it is bad writing and… well… boring.

Next week Adena’s finally back! (YAY!) but it looks like she’s coming back to be the token biphobic lesbian (BOO!) and I’m not looking forward to it.

For my money, Drew really summed up this week’s episode best: “Kat, yes we knew you were bisexual; what we’ve learned is you’re switchier than you thought!” Kat may be bonafide switch, but this episode was a swing and a miss.

Black Lightning 314: “Book of War: Chapter One: Homecoming ”

Written by Carmen

Everyone is home safe from Markovia!

During Pierce family dinner Lyn admits that she needs to get treatment for her Greenlight addiction while Anissa lowers her lashes and bashfully admits to her family that she thinks “Grace might be the one.” HER CUTE LIL FACE AS SHE SAYS IT!!!! I wanted to shove my whole fist in my mouth and just scream!!! I can’t even describe it. See for yourself:


Honestly, that would’ve been enough to send me away sweet dreaming on queer cloud nine, but wait! There’s more!! The Markovians have bum-rushed South Freeland and captured some of the Perdi. So Anissa suits up — with Grace!! Who has clothes ready to go in Anissa’s super hero closet!!! — to save them. They meet Black Lightning on the scene and Anissa says, “How about we give them a little Lightning and Thunder” before Grace chimes in “with a touch of grace” and once again my friends, I screamed.

Grace Choi kicks some Markovian military ass (the show seems to have settled back into a version of Grace’s super strength powers from the comics and to be honest — I’m not mad about it at all). If you’ve been wondering for about the past year now about how the Markovians came to care about the United States and Freeland in the first place…. Finally we have our answer.

The person who delivers this gift is none other than my beloved Lady Eve. I want to write another 500 words solely about how pitch-fucking-perfect Jill Scott is in this role. How Lady Eve is the only villain the show ever had who cold hold a light to Tobias Whale. I want to write about her smooth, sweet voice, her cleavage, her cool as ice attitude. I want to tell you that not only was she the one who orchestrated the hit on Gambi back in Season Two; she’s also the one who taught Tobias the “raise the dead” spell that he used to bring Lala back to life in Season One. Is this some BTS plot reconstruction and fan service to explain her absence? Of course it is. And I will gladly take it. Black Lightning is better with Lady Eve in it and some things are just facts.

So Lady Eve has in her possession the suitcase that was once Lala’s, and before that was Tobias’, and before that belonged to the ASA. After a stand-off with Gambi (see: the previously mentioned hit on his life), Lady Eve turns the case over because even she realizes that the Markovians are bad news. In the top secret suitcase is the entire history of the Greenlight experiment, down all the way to Patient One — Gravedigger.

I don’t have time to get into all the details here, but if you want to see what black science fiction and afro-futurist stories look like at their best, please watch Gravedigger’s origin. The last ten minutes of Black Lightning are some of the best they’ve put forth. Taking a Captain America-style origin story, tying it into histories of systematic anti-black racism in the US military, and demonstrating how the perversions of racism can seep between every line and leave no choice but to take one world’s “All American hero” myth and instead turn the person into a villain of white America’s own creation?

GAH, it’s a so, so good.

Station 19 305 & 306: “Into the Woods” and “Ice Ice Baby”

Written by Carmen

AT JOE’S BAR EVEN!!!! A true Shondaland gay fairytale.

So Krista Vernoff, the Grey’s Anatomy showrunner since Shonda left for Netflix, has also taken over as the showrunner for Station 19. Despite the fact that I think her time helming the mothership on Grey’s has produced uneven results, I’m really enjoying what she’s doing with the firehouse. If you fell off of Station 19 before, this season is a great place to jump back in.

As it relates to our interests, one of the biggest switches is an increased focus on hot bisexual Olympian firefighter Maya (now Captain Maya to you). Last week we got an episode devoted to Maya’s origin story. In short: Her dad was an obsessive, overly competitive, overbearing asshat who didn’t teach Maya to have human feelings and also ruined her one shot a teen love with a girl on her track team. And now she doesn’t know how to act like a human being capable of friendship or loyalty or love. Basically, she’s hot bisexual Olympian robot Maya. SAD!!!

It doesn’t necessarily excuse why Maya is the way she is — arguably stepping over her best friend’s back on her way to a promotion as captain; breaking the heart of her boyfriend along the way to do so. But at least it’s moved Maya up from her previous status as “so boring it’s like watching paint dry.” Yes, I might be rooting against Maya sometimes (often), but at least now  I’m finally invested in her, you know? At least there’s an emotion attached.

One of the many great things about Krista’s tenure as dual showrunner is now there’s more cross-series romantic storylines happening, helping to turn the two-hour commitment of Grey’s/ Station 19 on Thursdays into something that feels more like one continuous show. Thus far, I’m really into it! And for Maya that means enter… drumroll please… DR. ORGASM!!!!!!

We all know that I love me some Carina DeLuca! And Grey’s has never really known what to do with her, ever since Arizona broke her heart to run back into Calliope Iphegenia Torres’ arms #SorryNotSorry.

Last week their eyes met at Joe’s Bar. Doves cried and the rainbow skies parted. Tegan and Sara sang a love song duet with Mary Lambert while Brandi Carlile played piano. True to form, this week Carina recommended that Maya tell a patient in crisis giving an emergency birth during a blizzard to, you guessed it, masturbate. (Dr. Orgasm, please never change!)

When it’s over Maya does a little flirting of her own, promising Carina that they’ve yet to scratch the surface of .. ahem.. all  the things that Maya is good at.

There’s a gay crossover romance brewing in Shondaland. And I for one, cannot wait.

Boobs on Your Tube: The Bold Type’s Throwing a Sex Party! Happy Valentine’s Day!

Happy Valentine’s Day! Whatever love looks like for you today, we are definitely wishing you a bunch of it.

Here’s what happened in Autostraddle television coverage this week: Riese and Carly recapped The L Word mothership episode where Tina goes to Canada for no good reason and Shane and Carmen get matching tattoos (sad, we all know how that ends). The entire TV Team got in on that “The 5 TV Shows To Get To Know Me” meme and believe it or not, Glee ends up on that list TWICE! Sara and Ava go back to the 1980s and 2004 on Legends of Tomorrow. Mishel Prada guest starred on Riverdale while Cheryl and Toni danced real sexy together under some bisexual lighting. And finally, Callie and Mariana Foster forgive each other and make up their sister bond just in times for the big love holigay.

Notes from the TV Team: 

+  Grace got to go on the superhero field trip as promised on Black Lightning! She got to shape shift and helped the team, though sadly there wasn’t much time for romance between her and Anissa. However, we were treated to this exceptional tweet. — Carmen

https://twitter.com/chantal_thuy/status/1227083208379944961?s=12

+ There was some very light teen lesbianage on this week’s Grey’s Anatomy. A slow walk reveal about the daughter of one of the patients. It wasn’t quite enough to warrant a full recap, but it was damn sweet. I also want to say that the last two episodes of Grey’s have been my favorite of the season! Obviously a show that’s been on air for 16 years is going to have its ups and downs, but I’ve had a hard time getting invested this year. Between the increased storyline for Glasses and Nico, and Debbie Allen buying Pac-North, I’ve been zapped right out of that fog! Welcome back Grey’s, I missed you! — Carmen

+ There was a thruple featured on House Hunters this week! None of us watch the show regularly, unfortunately, but our friends can’t stop talking about it! We figured you would want to know. — Carmen

They would like three sinks, please.

All American 212: “Only Time Will Tell”

Written by Natalie

Since this week’s episode title didn’t provoke a panic attack about what might happen to Coop, we can just jump straight into this week’s recap: Coop stops by the LA County Jail to visit Preach who remains locked up after his run in with Tyrone last week. Coop asks how he’s keeping himself entertained but, as is Preach’s wont, he cuts through the BS and asks Coop why she keeps visiting him in jail. She admits she’s glad to have someone to talk to since she hasn’t seen Patience in months and keeps dodging Spencer’s calls. Preach reminds Coop that the shooting wasn’t her fault and encourages her to focus on herself and her music. Preach urges Coop to focus on her future, lest she end up in jail just like him.

A few days later, Layla tracks Coop down at the Slauson Cafe to talk. Layla asks why Coop’s been MIA from Spencer’s life but Coop assures her she’s just been busy. Busy with music, Layla hopes, as she attempts to recruit Coop into collaborating on another project. Coop hasn’t really been working on her music lately but when she hears the beat, the creativity sparks in her eyes. Still, Coop doesn’t say no right away but once Layla sells it as an opportunity for both of them to prove themselves, she’s in. They head over to Layla’s father’s studio so that Coop can meet the production engineers but, as they’re walking through the halls, Coop hears a familiar voice. She follows the voice into a nearby studio and discovers Patience in the booth, recording some cliched pop hit.

“Yeah, I’m lookin’ fancy, the boys all wanna have me/ Yeah, yeah, I’m lookin’ good, I’m so expensive,” Patience sings. It’s so wrong on so many levels, I’m dumbfounded Patience would agree to this. The couple catches each others eye through the studio glass and Coop immediately leaves.

Knowing that she needs her best friend, Coop finally reaches out to Spencer. He chastises her for ghosting him and she admits that she felt guilty for getting him shot. He assures her it wasn’t her fault and says he just wants his best friend back. He tells her he heard what happened and the studio. Despite her insistence that she’s busy with other things, Spencer encourages her to continue with her music: she’s great at it and you never know when that greatness can be taken away.

Back in Crenshaw, Patience catches up with Coop at the Cafe. They make small talk to cut the tension between them but it doesn’t work. Patience confesses that she wants to be friends again and Coop’s open to the idea but not yet. She asks about Patience’s work with Layla’s father and Patience admits that it’s been hard…things aren’t flowing as easily as when she and Coop worked together.

Coop reminds her, “you’re even better than whatever they think you are. Just gotta do you, Patience, and go get it.”

grown-ish 305: “Gut Feeling”

Written by Natalie

For the last five months or so, the baby Nomi Segal’s been carrying has been theoretical. Yes, she was pregnant but the life inside her was more of an idea than an actual person…something to love her or, perhaps, her biggest mistake. But the theoretical becomes empirical this week as she gets a look at her baby from a 3-D ultrasound. There was a heartbeat, a nose, eyes and smile; this baby was real and it was hers.

Now that’s it’s real, Nomi has to address all the questions that she’s been avoiding until now…namely whether or not she should give the baby up for adoption. The acknowledgement brings her “MILF To Be” shower to a screeching halt and the girls gather around and discuss it. Nomi’s parents have been trying to push her towards adoption but Ana reminds her that there are a lot of student parents that make it work. Nomi clarifies that her parents aren’t forcing her to give the child up for adoption, they’re just recommending it strongly. When Zoey pushes Nomi for more answers, she admits that she feels obligated to raise her child.

“Why does Nomi have to give up her life to deal with it though? There’s so many alternatives nowaday…her mistake — which are your words, not mine — could become a blessing for someone else,” Zoey wonders. She encourages Nomi not to be too quick to discount adoption as an option.

Exasperated by the ongoing conversation, Nomi admits that she’s torn but is especially worried about having to raise a child alone. Ana asks about the father’s role and Nomi acknowledges that she hasn’t told him about the pregnancy yet. The room’s split: most are convinced that Nomi should tell the baby’s father but Doug and Vivek agree that the optimal moment has past. As she’s wont to do, Ana chimes with condemnation, chastising Nomi for denying the baby and their father a relationship. Later, Ana apologizes for overstepping but then oversteps one more time, handing Nomi the contact information for her baby’s father.

Later, Zoey sits down with Nomi and gives her the unvarnished truth: no one else can make this decision for her. Nomi agrees but realizes that she can’t make the decision at Cal U (WHAT?!) so she packs up and leaves (WHAT?!).

Everything about this storyline — from its inconceivable beginning to its unfulfilling end — has been a mess. While part of me is glad it’s over, as I watched Nomi Segal drive away (maybe for forever), I was heartbroken that this is how it ends.

Deputy 107: “10-8 Search and Rescue”

Written by Natalie

What Deputy scratched the surface of two weeks ago, the show digs into, in earnest, in this week’s episode. It starts as episodes usually do: Bishop detailing the Sheriff’s schedule, highlighting any potential political mindfields, and their boss dismissing every suggestion as though it’s not worthy of his time. But today, their banter is interrupted by an on-coming truck that slams into the car’s passenger side. The pair are rushed to the hospital: the Sheriff treated and released while Bishop is sidelined by a forehead laceration and possible concussion.

At first, it feels like Deputy is repeating one of its most frustrating habits — pushing Bishop aside while the men get to save LA — but it quickly morphs into something more revealing. The Sheriff’s wife, Dr. Paula Reyes (played by Jane the Virgin’s Yara Martinez), stops by to check on Bishop. Bishop panics and they abruptly shut down the conversation. Later, after their release, they stops by the Sheriff’s home to apologize to Paula and explain their angry reaction. Bishop admits that they nearly told Paula the truth earlier but was afraid of being judged.

Bishop confesses that it’s always been difficult for them to talk about biological things and that, until recently, they didn’t have a vocabulary to explain how that felt. But even when they knew the words, they allowed others to continue with their assumptions, prioritizing everyone else’s comfort over their own.

“This accident made it very clear that tomorrow is not a guarantee and I need to be me. I’m getting closer every day to exactly what that is but for now, I know I’m not all woman,” Bishop explains. The admission brings immediate relief to Bishop’s face — they’ve needed to say this aloud — but they worry about Genevieve’s possible rejection. Paula assures Bishop that they’re a remarkable person and if Genevieve rejects them, she never deserved Bishop in the first place.

The Bold Type 404: “Babes in Toyland”

Written by Carmen

Just so you know, they are holding hands while watching three women masturbate.

Well this was certainly my favorite episode of The Bold Type yet! And not just because it’s about one of my favorite subjects, fancy vibrators and masturbation (though, ok… yeah… it’s at least 40% because of that).

Sage, who’s that friend of the Core Three that we don’t see that often? She hangs out with Alex sometimes, you know the one? Ok. Sage has friends who are launching a fancy schmancy women owned vibrator company called Broad, and it’s all the rage at the office. Kat takes one, Sutton takes one that can be controlled via long distance for her and Richard, even Jacqueline takes one (called Her Majesty, natch). Nothing better than free vibrators, so we are off!

Kat’s, ahem, getting off quite literally when Jane calls her later that night. I’ve been vocal for a while now about what The Bold Type gets right about sex and queer sex, especially for a YA drama, and Kat masturbating is no different! There is nothing that could have brought me more joy than getting to see a young black woman, lights on, fully just… going for it, you know? That’s a message I want out there in a world! You don’t need a partner to have great sex.

So of course Kat is pissed when Sage tells her that Broad has been banned from putting up a billboard in the city that promotes women’s pleasure. Kat and Sage launch a twitter war, pointing out the sexist double standard that Broad’s billboards are being taken down while the much more graphic promotions of this Viagra-lite drug called Rect are allowed to just exist with no question. The fury leads to some of their followers to call for a boycott of Rect and Scarlet almost gets sued as a result. Jacqueline isn’t against promoting women’s sexual independence, of course, but she isn’t a fan of lawsuits. Kat hears her and promises to change the course of her messaging.

Which leads us to the SEX PARTY! Sage pitched a story about the rise of millennial sex parties (why is no one inviting me?) but she can’t do it, which means Jane goes and takes Sutten and Kat along for the.. ugh… ride. While at the party Kat spies some women masturbating poolside. Even though they could be having sex with anyone there, they still choose to have sex with themselves first. It sparks a new angle for her campaign.

Kat interviews the women at the party about their self-pleasure and it goes pretty viral on Scarlet’s Instagram. Jacqueline, forever Mommi boss, congratulates Kat on all her hard work lately – but encourages her not to forget her own personal life. Which leads to the two reveals I am MOST excited about: 1. Kat stares longingly at a picture of Tia (!!!) on her phone and 2. Kat re-launches her Tindr profile.

And according to the previews, guess who’s definitely having hot sex with a woman next week? Kat effing Edison.

Happy Valentine’s Day from the TV TEAM!!

It can really feel cliché to say out loud, but every member of this team got into the TV game because we believe, on some root level, that representation still matters. Lesbian, bisexual, and queer women in love still move us right down to the center of who we are. Nothing feels quite as good as being able to see yourself reflected back on the screen.

So, in that light, we collected some of our favorite quick scenes of TV ladies kissing. This isn’t an exhaustive list. In fact, there is no rhyme or reason to it at all. This is random and sweet and just because we love you. Wherever you are and whatever you’re doing – Happy Valentine’s Day!

XOXO

Boobs on Your Tube: Those Thunder Grace Kisses Are Sparking up Black Lightning!

We finally made it! It’s the end of the month!

First, this week we said goodbye to the first season of The L Word: Generation Q and whew we did so with a flourish! There were FIVE POSTS about the show this week alone! Here’s what you missed:

In other parts of the TV World, we hosted a roundtable about how dang much we love She-Ra. Heather called Fortune Feimster’s new Netflix comedy special “Sweet and Salty” a love letter to lesbian tomboys. Kayla watched the new season of the Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina and deemed it a muddled, but still magical, mess. Then Winn returned for a very special episode of Supergirl. Kayla wondered is she’s the only one who remembers that Cheryl and Toni exist on Riverdale. Alice learned some good lesbian boundaries on Good Trouble. Edie Falco is brilliant as LA’s lesbian police chief in Tommy. And last but not least, Drew wrote a beautifully personal farewell to the first season of Work in Progress. 

Notes from the TV Team: 

+ I must admit, I’ve been disappointed with Deputy thus far, particularly Bex Taylor-Kaus’ limited role in it. Their appearance in last night’s episode (“10-8 Black & Blue”) was frustratingly brief, but Bishop returns home to find that Genevieve’s found old pictures of a more feminine presenting Brianna Bishop in boxes from DC. Genevieve leaves a flirty note — “who is this cutie?” — but Bishop’s reaction to it hints at a forthcoming storyline about Bishop’s gender presentation. — Natalie

+ Cupid (or something like him) was on Legacies this week but Josie is trapped in a prison world so her and Hope couldn’t explore their feelings for each other via magical means and I am SAD ABOUT IT. — Valerie Anne

All American 210: “Protect Ya Neck”

Written by Natalie

The title of this episode left me a little paranoid. Without Preach’s protection, Coop is as vulnerable to Tyrone as she’s ever been so I watched the episode on high alert, anticipating the moment trouble would darken Coop’s door. And it does, eventually, both in the way that I expect and in one that I don’t.

Despite the looming threat against her, Coop just wants to embrace some sense of normalcy. She invites Patience to accompany her to Olivia’s cotillion — it’s a “free gay prom,” Coop says, which is not how I’d describe the cotillions I’ve been to — so that they can have some fun. Patience is reluctant at first but ultimately agrees. But Coop’s excitement is muted by the arrival of Patience’s old friend, Luna, who’s in town for the cotillion. Coop is immediately jealous about their rapport and dismayed that Patience never told her friend about their relationship. Later, the couple meets in the park to talk about Luna but the chasm between them only grows deeper. Turns out, Luna and Patience are exes and the omission feeds into Coop’s paranoia about what’s going on between them.

The couple put aside their issues and attend the “free gay prom” together, with Coop’s mom happily snapping pictures of them together. Coop’s annoyed by her mom’s attentiveness but Patience reminds her how remarkable it is, “You do appreciate what’s going on here, don’t you? Your mom, the woman who threw you out of her house, is now playing paparazzi with her gay daughter and her gay daughter’s girlfriend.”

But Luna persists in interrupting the date night and Coop grows angrier. Coop insta-stalks Luna and realizes that she’s Patience’s first love — the one that inspired her to come out — and it sparks a confrontation between the couple. They’ve lost trust in each other and Patience tearfully admits that they need some time apart.

Patience: Like, you freaked out because J.P. was more interested in me as an artist than he was in you and now you’re freaking out because I’m still friends with my ex-girlfriend?
Coop: I’m freaking out because I love you.
Patience: I know, but I don’t want to be loved like this.

The heartbreak is painful to watch but when Coop realizes that she’s been jealous and paranoid, I’m optimistic that it’ll be temporary. But just when I think Coop will escape “Protect Ya Neck” relatively unscathed, her best friend — who’s spent the episode trying to protect her — is shot as he escorts Olivia to her car.

Arrow 810: “Fadeout”

Written by Valerie Anne

nyssa al ghul

Missed you, bb.

This week was Arrow‘s final episode, and we said goodbye to the show where Sara Lance got her start. Much to my delight, she wasn’t the only one at Oliver’s funeral; Nyssa al Ghul made her triumphant return, as well. Nyssa told her sister about how her marriage to Oliver was a sham, and introduces Sara as her “beloved” for old time’s sake. I do hope Nyssa goes on to date Laurel2 (or anyone, really) and find her own happily ever after, but I can’t blame her for holding a torch for her Ta-er al-Sahfer. I’ll admit I haven’t really been watching much of Arrow since Felicity left, but I will be watching the Green Arrow and the Canaries spinoff if it happens, and I will forever be grateful for the show for giving us characters like Felicity and Laurel(s) and Thea and Dinah and Mia. And, of course, our fearless Captain Sara Lance.

Nancy Drew 112: “The Lady of Larkspur Lane”

Written by Valerie Anne

amaya and bess

:Catra voice: Hey, Amaya.

Nancy Drew is really throwing me for all kinds of gay loops. First it gives me the very cute pairing of Bess and Lisbeth. Then it accidentally taunts me with cute Nancy/Bess interactions. (That’s not the show’s fault, they’re not doing anything but having these girls develop a friendship, I just love them both and can’t help myself.) But now they introduced Bess to Amaya, a woman Bess’ new aunt is trying to get to “mentor” Bess, a woman who calls Bess a snack and is hilarious, smart, and bold.

She assumes Bess knows nothing of her world and makes her sit in silence while she has a business meeting, but Amaya’s boldness makes Bess more brazen. She speaks up for herself and proves Amaya’s snap judgements wrong. And I love Lisbeth but, to borrow language from Season Two of Sex Education, she doesn’t make Bess sparkle. Not the way Amaya did. I think she might be more up to Bess’ speed, but Lisbeth was so sweet and supportive I feel bad rooting against her. So I don’t know what will happen or even what I want to happen, I just know that I love that Bess’ queerness is just a known and accepted thing at this point and we can focus on things like love triangles. Plus all the ghosts and murder.

The Bold Type 402: “#Scarlet”

Written by Carmen

“…. yes, they use all 10 fingers. And that’s how lesbians have sex!”

Last week on The Bold Type Kat saved Jacqueline’s job! But not before the suits in the board room decided to follow IRL media trends and move Scarlet magazine to an all digital platform (see also: Teen Vogue and Glamour). Is this going to do anything help stop the fantasies I play in my head that Autostraddle’s feminist can do spirit could be Scarlet magazine if only capitalism were fake and we had $$$ to spend on New York City high rise offices and a limitless fashion closet? No, it will not!

OK so Scarlet is becoming #Scarlet. To launch their first digital issue, Jaqueline would like to celebrate the magazine’s past. That means Kat has to interview celebrities whom got their start at the magazine, like Bella Diaz. Except interviewing Bella is the last thing Kat wants to do! You see, many years ago when Bella was a just-starting-out singer, and Kat hadn’t yet realized her own queerness, Bella came out to her at a photo shoot. And Kat listened to Bella’s then-manager and buried the story. So yeah, she has a lot of leftover shame over that whole deal.

When Kat meets up with Bella in our current timeline, she apologizes for not being more supportive. Bella downplays it, and says coming out isn’t important to her anymore, which of course sets Kat’s mind in motion. It turns out that back then Bella was in love with her pianist, but they’ve since broken up (the pianist didn’t want to stay with Bella in the closet). Bella doesn’t feel ready to publicly come forward – and risk her career! – without her.

At the digital launch party, Kat tells Bella about how scary it was her to navigate her queerness without Adena, but how ultimately she found more truth and bravery in herself because she did. Once again I really have to applaud The Bold Type, so many YA-focused television shows only focus on the romance of queer love stories, and TBT has found a way to make Kat’s queerness ever-present and tied to the adult woman she’s becoming, regardless of whom she’s sleeping with.

Anyway, Bella tells Kat that she’s still not ready to come out, but I’d love for Kat to have a queer woman of color friend that she’s not sleeping with, so I hope Bella ultimately stays around. I may get my wish. Later that night Bella privately shares “Brave” with Kat, the first song she wrote about falling in love with a woman. (Fun Fact: Bella Diaz is played by Latin Grammy nominee Sofia Reyes, who has released “Brave” exclusively on her YouTube channel and you should give it a listen!)

Black Lightning 311: “The Book of Markovia: Chapter Two: Lynn’s Addiction”

Written by Carmen

Anissa and Grace, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

When we said goodbye to Black Lightning for the winter break, I wished for two things: 1. That I would learn better patience with the show and 2. That the production behind the series would learn to treat the show’s sole queer relationship with some respect.

Well, I must have been a good girl over the holidays, because Santa left some presents underneath my TV tree! Not only is Grace Choi back on the series (and flirting marvelously with Anissa – damn Nafessa Williams and Chantal Thuy’s chemistry remains off the charts), but she’s coming back to Freeland! After having an emotionally mature conversation actually on screen with her girlfriend, nonetheless! When Anissa visits Grace at the metahuman camp in South Freeland, Grace explains that she’s realized the cause of her shapeshifting is feeling insecure in her surroundings. She’s lived her entire life being abandoned, and once she started falling deep for Anissa, she worried that something might happen that would ruin the one good thing she had in her life. That caused everything inside her body – powers included – to tumble into free fall.

But even when Anissa sent Grace away to protect her, she never let go. She always comes back, and the few times she can’t, she makes sure Grace is safe with her dad. Despite all the metaphorical storms and literal Markovian/ASA drama surrounding them, Grace now realizes that Anissa is her rock and nothing will move her. She convinces Anissa that it’s safe for her to (finally!!!!! And hopefully, for good!!!) come back home. It’s 2020 and I am choosing optimism. Let this next step be the first of many. I’m so ready to root for Thunder Grace, if only Black Lightning will let me.

As excited as I am for the return of Grace Choi – and I am! – she is not the reason that my fellow TV Team member Natalie ran to text me mid-episode earlier this week. Oh no. That honor is reserved for the baddest damn bitch in the room. You see, last week Black Lightning ended on a glimmer… a hope… a cliffhanger that I almost didn’t allow myself to believe could be true. But here we are friends. HERE WE ARE:

IDK care what y’all say, this definitely counts as Gay ContentTM

LADY FUCKING EVE IS BACK FROM THE DEAD!!! After three years, I could’ve just cried at the purr of her voice. So far Lala (our most common Black Lightning undead) thinks he has Eve under his thumb. But if there’s one thing that we all know, it’s that you can’t keep a good bitch down. I’m sure Eve has something tucked away as she plots her return to the top of Freeland’s underworld. And I can’t wait to see it.

Boobs on Your Tube: “Stumptown” Puts Dex on Stronger Bisexual Footing in the New Year!

Hello and welcome back to Boobs on Your Tube! We missed you! While on holigay break, the Autostraddle TV Team stayed busy keeping you up to date. If you’d like to catch up, we have you covered. Meanwhile, this is what happened this week:

First, Riese recapped the latest episode of The L Word: Generation Q in her supreme, trademarked, super detailed and incredibly snarky form! Her recaps are truly the TV event of every week and you don’t want to miss them! Speaking of one-of-a-kind television events and Generation Q, Drew and Annalyssa are back with another episode of To L and Back, so you can get your recap fix in a podcast – whatever your needs, we are here to provide.  Kate McKinnon introduced Ellen Degeneres for her Golden Globe Lifetime Achievement Award and we cried buckets, but Heather’s here to remind us that we still have a long way to go. Maddy wrote an intensely personal essay about Catfish of all things. Carmen considered the role of nostalgia television from the Bush era that just might help us survive Trump. Valerie was disappointed to find out that the new lesbian storyline in Season Two of “Light as a Feather” was really stiff as a board. Heather got us the trailer for Cate Blanchett (!!) and Sarah Paulson’s (!!!) new limited series, Mrs. America about the right wing takedown of the feminist movement in the 1970s. Here was Carmen’s review: “I am not prepared for a world where I am physically attracted to Phyllis Schlafly.” So say we all.

BREAKING NEWS: The Autostraddle TV Team’s “Winter 2020 TV Preview: Where To Find All The LGBTQ Women and Trans People on Your Television” is OFFICIALLY HERE. Be sure to get in on that!

Here’s what else!

Notes from the TV Team: 

+ This is technically not a part of our coverage, but I thought you’d want to know the sad news that Dr. Alex Karev is leaving Grey’s Anatomy after 16 seasons!  Apparently there might be some drama behind it.  — Carmen

+ Also I owe you an update on God Friended Me. I apologize because this week got away from me, but you’ll have it next week! — Carmen

Stumptown 110: “Reality Checks Don’t Bounce”

Written by Heather

Stumptown continues to surprise me. Well, actually that’s not true. The least surprising thing in the world is that this network TV show has made Dex’s life revolve around the men in it, and that she hardly ever interacts with other women in any signifiant way that lasts more than one episode. What surprises me is, despite that, I keep showing up for it! I love Dex and Cobie Smulders’ portrayal of her — including her nonchalant bisexuality — is pitch-perfect. Anyway, before the holiday break, Sue Lynn told Dex to get her shit together and it looks like she’s really going to do it, including putting a stop to the love triangle that has already grown tedious over ten episodes. Now that Ansel has moved out, and Grey and Hoffman are forming a tentative alliance, as opposed to doing turf wars over Dex, it seems like she’s going to get some storylines of her own!

One of the most interesting things to me about this week’s episode is how patient it was, in terms of character development, and it paid off with some legit emotional resonance. The camera lingeres on Dex’s face. The case of the week — a kidnapping and a squabble between brothers — reflects and helps her resolve her family struggles (it’s all very Grey’s Anatomy actually). She’s town, as usual, between doing what’s right and getting paid. And maybe she’s even going to seek treatment for her PTSD. It’s a good set up for the back half of the season; hopefully Grey and Hoffman will fall in love with each other and leave her alone.

Deputy 101-102: “Graduation Day” and “10-8 Outlaws”

Written by Natalie

They’re just so cute together!

There’s a moment, about midway through Deputy‘s first episode, where the newly appointed Sheriff of LA County, Bill Hollister, interrupts a previously scheduled joint operation with ICE and orders all his deputies to go home. He wants people to know, “regardless of how they got here,” to know that they can come to the Sheriff’s Office for help. To do anything else, he says, is like “gift-wrapping about a million victims for every bad guy in town to prey on with total impunity.”

It’s a progressive vision of policing — one that threatens to cost the county millions in federal grants — that I’d usually rush to celebrate. But my enthusiasm is tempered by knowing that, but for an ill-timed heart attack, the ICE-defying sheriff would have been one of the deputies pulled from the field for having too many instances of brutality in his file. This is the guy we’re supposed to cheer for; this is our hero?

Through the first two episodes of Deputy that kind of juxtaposition has become the show’s hallmark…at once, attempting to be a new kind of police procedural while also embracing the (worst) hallmarks of past procedurals. Even the show’s diversity feels both refreshing and regressive. In the past, Bex Taylor-Kaus’ Brianna Bishop would be a male character…in fact, on the shortlived and underappreciated Chicago Code (which starred Jennifer Beals as the newly appointed police superintendent), the ambitious, astute, talented driver/security guard was a male character. Instead, Deputy gives that role to nonbinary actor and the character comes out in the show’s first episode. Refreshing, right? But Bishop comes out by way of a U-Haul joke…a U-Haul joke she has to explain to her clueless boss who, apparently, has never known a lesbian before now. How is this a conversation we’ve having in 2020?

I hope that Deputy finds a way to reconcile its identity soon because Kaus is so endearing in their role. Plus? Last night’s episode introduced her girlfriend, Genevieve, played by Claws‘ Karrueche Tran…and Karrueche playing queer is everything I never knew I always wanted.

Almost Family 110: “Couragous AF”

Written by Valerie Anne!

almost family edie and the bartender

Good outfits and bad ideas.

I want to start out by saying I’m really enjoying Almost Family. And it’s because I’ve been having such a great time that I want to talk about a huge issue it’s having. I want to call them out but with love. Calling in, if you will.

In the past few episodes, Amanda and Edie have super cute. Edie broke it off with her husband to commit to Edie, Edie introduced Amanda to her son’s other mother, etc. Things were moving along nicely. Until this week. It started with a flirty bartender. Amanda sees Edie with the bartender and says she should date other girls, since Amanda was the first girl she’d ever been with. Which is flawed logic, but we learn that Amanda’s ex got in her head about it, and also Amanda felt insecure because THEIR relationship started because Edie got curious. So I’ll forgive her.

What I cannot forgive, is the lesbian kickball team Edie meets on this strange quest. Things were off to a good start because the team is called the Dixie Kicks, but it was all downhill from there. Full of lesbians that apparently time traveled here from 2005, they complain about “heteroflexible” girls and “goldfish” – a term I think the writers made up that means a straight girl “fishing” for “gold star lesbians,” an outdated/biphobic/judgemental term in itself. So they’re using outdated, biphobic, and made up language, all at the same time; naturally Edie is confused. She tries to make out with the bartender, but her heart’s not in it; she just wants Amanda. I knew I was gay before I ever kissed ANYONE of any gender, so all of this seems misguided at best. If Edie realizes she’s a lesbian, that’s totally valid. Plenty of lesbians I know were in long-term relationships with men before they realized they were gay. But the fact that no one has even said the word bisexual yet is driving me absolutely batty.

I hope the show gets its act together on this front soon, or, at the VERY least, just stops talking about Edie’s sexuality at all and focuses instead on Edie and Amanda’s relationship. LET ME LOVE YOU, ALMOST FAMILY.

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