I know you’ve been planning for Pride 2023 since Pride 2022 because you are just that gay, but get ready to add a few more things to that shopping list because we’ve got NEW MERCH just in time for your sweaty summer shenanigans, plus 20% off everything in the store using the code AUTOPRIDE! (25% off if you’re an A+ member!! Join today!!)

We surveyed and asked, planned and discussed — and we came up with a new A+ level! When we introduced Cobalt ($4 a month) in 2015, it was to make A+ accessible to a larger group of people.

Platinum is kind of the opposite of that — an option for those of you who want to give more than our current levels allow and really level up the number of times in any 24 hour period you’re reminded that they’re an A+ member! You’ll have a mug, a keychain, a hand-sewn bag, a bookmark, and your choice of book! You can feel absolutely A+ about keeping queer media alive throughout all your daily activities.

Every member level — from our $30/year Cobalt members to our $500/year Platinums — gets access to the same A+ content and community (like A+ Pop-Up Discord Servers), but it’s a choose-you-own-gay-adventure in terms of the amount you contribute!

You can choose from one of these recently published LGBTQ books! Right now, you can choose from:

We’ll be sure to drop in small surprises to our boxes like an extra coupon to our store, just to add a little more love.

Every year, toward the end of the year, Platinum members will get another, smaller package of A+ exclusive perks sent to them as thanks for their continued support!

Interested?

Join A+ Platinum

Already a member? (First, THANK YOU. You’re amazing and your hair looks excellent today.)

Upgrade to Platinum

Haven’t you heard? Summer isn’t over yet, and it’s only going to get hotter from here. And the only way to deal with the chaos of the world is by being chaotic ourselves. Those in the community should very well know what I’m talking about, so wear it loud and wear it proud: the Gay Chaos tank top is the item of the summer. It’s 100% cotton and soft yet thin, so it’ll keep you cool in more ways than one. Now available in the Autostraddle Store!

As always, every purchase you make in the Autostraddle Store is a chance to support this website! Your money goes directly into the pockets of our staff. So buy yourself something cute and feel good knowing you’re also supporting the people making this website happen.

Pride is around the corner, and you want to look as gay as possible, sometimes in a way that is only visible to other gay people and sometimes in a way that is out and proud in front of the whole world: we understand. We have merch for you and for one week only we’re offering 25% off EVERYTHING site-wide, using code PRIDE22. Check out some of the items below.

25% Discount code: PRIDE22

Valid May 23 – 28

As always, every purchase you make in the Autostraddle Store is a chance to support this website! Your money goes directly into the pockets of our staff. So buy yourself something cute and feel good knowing you’re also supporting the people making this website happen.

Did you hear? We just launched a buttload of new merch in the Autostraddle store yesterday!

I want to give a BIG shoutout to everyone who participated in the merch conversation during our Discord event a few months ago! From those conversations we were inspired to turn the phrase “GAY CHAOS” from Surabhi into a pair of amazing socks and a gorgeous sticker. We also created The Lazy Femmes tee — which came out of a conversation about how queer merch kinda feels like band tees sometimes. And finally Snails, who tie-dyed their own Who All’s Gay Here tee, which inspired our very own tie-dyed version. Here are some of the conversations we had with you below:

Thank you for being an A+ Member — scroll down to the bottom of this post to get your super special code to save 20% off everything in the Autostraddle Store.

xoxo,

Sarah

Our beloved Queer as Fuck tee is now a hoodie! Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Printed on 100% Ringspun Combed Cotton, Mineral Washed for Vintage Look. S – 3XL

Yes, it’s true. Our classic scissoring tee now comes in two beautiful jewel-tone shades — kelly green and rosy pink. Illustrated by Rory Midhani and printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Listen you can just call it a “hands tee” if you want, nobody has to know. Except the people who, you know…. know. Designed by Ren Strapp. Printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Our popular hat is now a t-shirt! Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Finding out who all is gay here remains an important item on our agenda. This time we tie-dyed it for you, so you can blend in just enough. Designed by Erin Sullivan. Hand-dyed on 100% cotton crewneck. XS – 3XL

A thing we have told ourselves about the heterosexual reaction to our shirts is that probably people think they are all band tees? Well, we decided to lean into that with this tee: introducing the Lazy Femmes! Designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper. Printed on a relaxed (loose-fitting), scoop-neck women’s style tee. XS – 2XL

Gay chaotic is chaotic good, we think? Putting this phrase all over our merch was a great suggestion from an A+ member in our Fundraiser Discord! You dreamed it and we believe it and now it is on your FEET. Concept by Kayla Kumari. Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Ribbed cotton crew with compression and cushion. One Size — will fit from a woman’s size 6 up to a men’s size 11.

Hands? On your feet?? Gay people are always doing the most progressive things. These cute black and white socks will go with absolutely everything in your closet. Run, don’t walk, and snag one of these coveted pairs that you can walk and run in! These cotton crew style socks are designed by Ren Strapp. One Size — will fit from a woman’s size 6 up to a men’s size 11.

Embrace your pride as someone who saw Xena when it aired with this pin! These fun, poppy pins are designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper.

Queer Elder – Yes, it’s true — the Queer Elder enamel pin also comes in a sticker! Designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper. Glossy, durable, UV protected, waterproof lamination. 2″ x 1.5”.

Gay Chaos – Is there any type of show you’d rather see on your TV than one that radiates gay chaos??? Designed by Betty Turbo. Glossy, durable, UV protected, waterproof lamination. 2.5″ x 2”.

Special A+ Code:XOXOAUTOSTRADDLE

December 1-17, 2021, Ends on 12/17 at 11:59pm PST

To get your deliveries in time for Christmas make sure to place your order by:

📦 Order by December 14th — USPS First Class Mail, Fed Ex Ground (pick up nearby)
📦 Order by December 15th — UPS Ground
📦 Order by December 16th — USPS Priority Mail
📦 Order by December 22nd — Next Day Air

🚙 Live in Phoenix, AZ? You can pick up your order! Order by Dec 22nd (850 W. Lincoln St, Phoenix, AZ 85007).

* These dates are for domestic orders–we have no guarantee for international orders, however DHL will always be the quickest, most reliable option. ♡

Conceptual Ideas / Riese, Sarah Sarwar, the Autostraddle Team, A+ Members
Designers / Sarah Sarwar, Rory Midhani, Erin, Ren Strapp, Betty Turbo, Kirstin Bencomo-CooperPrinting / Hello Merch, Sticker Ninja, Sock Club, The Pin People

You heard right — it’s the time of year where we serve up fresh, bright, zesty Autostraddle merch just in time for your holigay gifts list. As always we’re bringing you a f*ckton of new tees — including the next queer merch sure to baffle the heterosexuals — the Fisting 101 tee! We’re also very excited to be bringing back hoodies, and translating one of your all-time favorite designs into something warm to wear. It’s no surprise that Kayla Kumari has already brought her influence and style to the merch store by suggesting we create GAY CHAOS socks — what an absolute treat! I’m also so excited that we can finally offer many more pronoun pins and hilarious new stickers by some of our favorite queer artists.

As always, every purchase you make in the Autostraddle Store is a chance to support this website! Your money goes directly into the pockets of our staff — editors, writers, artists and me, in fact! So buy yourself something cute and feel good knowing you’re also supporting some very cute queer people making this website happen.

Enjoy shopping, and happy holigays y’all!

Love, Sarah

P.S. — Are you an A+ Member? You’ll get a super special 20% off code tomorrow — stay tuned! Not a member? You can join for as little as $4/month.

Our beloved Queer as Fuck tee is now a hoodie! Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Printed on 100% Ringspun Combed Cotton, Mineral Washed for Vintage Look. S – 3XL

Yes, it’s true. Our classic scissoring tee now comes in two beautiful jewel-tone shades — kelly green and rosy pink. Illustrated by Rory Midhani and printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Listen you can just call it a “hands tee” if you want, nobody has to know. Except the people who, you know…. know. Designed by Ren Strapp. Printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Our popular hat is now a t-shirt! Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Printed on super-soft triblend fabrication. XS – 3XL

Finding out who all is gay here remains an important item on our agenda. This time we tie-dyed it for you, so you can blend in just enough. Designed by Erin Sullivan. Hand-dyed on 100% cotton crewneck. XS – 3XL

A thing we have told ourselves about the heterosexual reaction to our shirts is that probably people think they are all band tees? Well, we decided to lean into that with this tee: introducing the Lazy Femmes! Designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper. Printed on a relaxed, scoop-neck women’s style tee. XS – 2XL

Gay chaotic is chaotic good, we think? Putting this phrase all over our merch was a great suggestion from an A+ member in our Fundraiser Discord! You dreamed it and we believe it and now it is on your FEET. Concept by Kayla Kumari. Designed by Sarah Sarwar. Ribbed cotton crew with compression and cushion. One Size — will fit from a woman’s size 6 up to a men’s size 11.

Hands? On your feet?? Gay people are always doing the most progressive things. These cute black and white socks will go with absolutely everything in your closet. Run, don’t walk, and snag one of these coveted pairs that you can walk and run in! These cotton crew style socks are designed by Ren Strapp. One Size — will fit from a woman’s size 6 up to a men’s size 11.

Embrace your pride as someone who saw Xena when it aired with this pin! These fun, poppy pins are designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper.

Queer Elder – Yes, it’s true — the Queer Elder enamel pin also comes in a sticker! Designed by Kirstin Bencomo-Cooper. Glossy, durable, UV protected, waterproof lamination. 2″ x 1.5”.

Gay Chaos – Is there any type of show you’d rather see on your TV than one that radiates gay chaos??? Designed by Betty Turbo. Glossy, durable, UV protected, waterproof lamination. 2.5″ x 2”.

To get your deliveries in time for Christmas make sure to place your order by:

📦 Order by December 14th — USPS First Class Mail, Fed Ex Ground (pick up nearby)
📦 Order by December 15th — UPS Ground
📦 Order by December 16th — USPS Priority Mail
📦 Order by December 22nd — Next Day Air

🚙 Live in Phoenix, AZ? You can pick up your order! Order by Dec 22nd (850 W. Lincoln St, Phoenix, AZ 85007).

* These dates are for domestic orders–we have no guarantee for international orders, however DHL will always be the quickest, most reliable option. ♡

Conceptual Ideas / Riese, Sarah Sarwar, the Autostraddle Team, A+ Members
Designers / Sarah Sarwar, Rory Midhani, Erin, Ren Strapp, Betty Turbo, Kirstin Bencomo-CooperPrinting / Hello Merch, Sticker Ninja, Sock Club, The Pin People

We only do this a couple of times a year, and rarely do we discount our merch so high! But if you shop in the Autostraddle Store between now and February 2nd, you’ll get 30% off absolutely everything using the code LOVEWINS30 at checkout.

The Autostraddle Store is full of some of the best gay merch you’ll ever lay your little gay eyes on. From t-shirts to enamel pins, we’ve really got the market cornered on saying your gay by, either explicitly or covertly, saying you’re gay. I proudly display the merch that I have, taking every opportunity to explain a sticker or a sweatshirt. I’ve even bought merch for friends as gifts. If you’re looking for the perfect treat for yourself or someone you love, look no further. I’ve even made it easy for you by outlining what lesbian stereotype select pieces of merch represent.

This sweatshirt is the dyke that will defend scissoring until her last breath. She will even perform a tutorial using her fingers to show you how it’s not just an invention of the male gaze, but one of the many ways two women can have sex. The Seasoned Dyke has been out for quite some time and she certainly won’t let you forget that you are a baby queer in her eyes. Oh you’ve only been out for five years? You can’t talk to her unless you endured school dances as someone out of the closet navigating dancing with other girls for the first time. The seasoned dyke would wear this sweatshirt anywhere, even to work. And when asked by her straight colleagues “are you into crafting?” she’ll give a sly smile and answer “No.” from the corner of her mouth. Is the seasoned dyke just me? Probably.

The Baby Queer has, as the name suggests, been out for less than 2 years. This mask screams baby queer because we all know flowers are very vulva-like, and you can get away with wearing a vulva on your face if it is hidden as a flower! Not quite in your face and playing with gay pride, the Baby Queer is the kind of lesbian who’s heart is racing as she merely asks you to go on a masked walk to the park. She’s unassuming and kind. Still probably afraid to talk to women, especially femmes, and will tweet about how she’s attracted to every woman that has walked the planet and maybe one guy. Flower Mask is an artist for sure, and lately their art has been leaning more nude and NSFW as they explore their queer identity.

This kit is not one person, but a group of people: the queers down the street from you living in an intentional community equipped with chickens and cats galore. None of them are poets, as you might assume, but they do “write for personal reasons” and never show their little dalliances to anyone. This community is probably vegan, and if not, they are totally very ethical about where they get their meat. Someone definitely works at Whole Foods but is staunchly anti-Amazon. The Commune Queens have probably all slept together at different times and that’s created some tension between them so the lovey-dovey surface is a mere facade for the festering cauldron of resentment underneath. But, they live together and are committed to being relationship anarchists in a capitalist world.

Yes, she’s well-read. Yes, a little mean about it. But the anti-intellectual administration we’ve lived through has had her on EDGE for four years! This dyke has read more Susan Sontag than you and she will tell you all her thoughts about “Notes on Camp” in terms you don’t really understand. At her core though, she just loves books, she loves being granted permission to enter another person’s world and become so intimately acquainted with their mind and heart. The Literary Dyke definitely has a book deal on the shelf and will have her book launch at her favorite small, locally owned bookstore or an art studio nearby. When she isn’t buying books she’s buying expensive coffee and fine tip pens for a perfectly curated writing experience.

You might think Rich Gay Aunt wouldn’t be caught dead in a simple t-shirt, but here’s where you’re wrong. First, this tee can be dressed up or down depending on the right accessories. The Who All’s Gay Here white tee with a black or red leather jacket, black jeans, and some bottom stomping boots? She’s the coolest Gay Aunt on the scene in that fit. The sentiment is what makes this match. The Rich Gay Aunt is not showing up to the function if it’s only populated by a bunch of boring heterosexuals talking about Game of Thrones. Or the Steelers. The Superbowl, whoever and whatever team that has nothing to do with the WNBA. Rich Gay Aunt lives by the phrase “catch flights, not feelings” and can often be seen taking a window seat selfie on a plane to some sunny destination. If she’s not single and playing the field, she is definitely married and living the most enviable life with her perfect wife.

This lesbian is all about consuming media. She’s a film buff, she’s a lit dyke, a food critic, and she’s secretly into watching bad reality television and speculating which housewife is licking another’s box. Dyke hat is probably very loud, in her fashion and her general volume. The side of herself she shows to the world is the one that is constantly writing whip-smart social commentary about what everyone else is talking about, and the things that everyone has overlooked. This season she’s probably got some nuanced take on Bridgerton. She’s one of the funniest people you’ll ever meet, hands down, she’s bold and in your face about her dykeness and her politics. The Culture Critic has a keen relationship with gay history, which is why she is this hat. She knows which old-timey celebrity was actually a huge homo and will run down the list of her lovers and films in seconds. When wearing this hat, she’ll probably sip a fun cocktail and tell you about which celebrity has been spotted hanging on Kristen Stewart’s arm lately. She’s always putting you on to new music, the latest book, a cute little vegan spot in a neighborhood a few miles from you. She’s the best person to hang out with because even her silence is intoxicating. You can’t help but wonder what sharp, intelligent thoughts are swimming in her head.

This tee is the dyke that is a miracle in bed. The ones involved in the most drama always are. They draw you in with good sex and suddenly you’re caught in a web of exes and allegations. The Bed-Wetter is a sexual wonder but she’s probably not the most emotionally ready or available, which is also why you’re drawn to her. That elusiveness is kind of sexy when you allow yourself to be a little messy. The Bed-Wetter is probably a long-haired butch, but could easily be someone that doesn’t want to tie herself to butch or femme. They are most likely very into playing with gender and might even be a drag king in their spare time. She misses gay bars and the laughter of women, dancing with women, going to Folsom and watching people get flogged in the streets. Oh, Dyke Drama Tee is definitely a freak, but you love her for it.

Gender Traitor pin has to be your Non-Binary Crush. You’re obsessed with them, their holographic fanny pack, and matching pastel hair. They probably have facial piercings and a split tongue or something. They are hot in a way that defies all sense and reason. They also have a fat ass that you just can’t help but marvel at. They are committed to dismantling the gender binary and living outside of the confines of masculinity vs femininity thinking. They are probably super into softcore indie rock and swaying side to side at a show, making eyes at you across the bar. They are so hot, I just want to reiterate that. Can you tell I have someone in mind that I really wanna kiss, is it obvious?? They probably went to Sarah Lawrence or Smith college and were radicalized once they left and started hanging with other out queers and going to therapy. They definitely hang in an anarchist crowd but will pen sentimental poetry/letters to the person they love.

What’s your go-to piece of Autostraddle merch in your closet? Mine is my trusty gal pal sweatshirt, for cheeky dykes that love to be warm and love to explain an inside joke to ignorant straight people. Don’t forget about our merch sale, use that code LOVEWINS30 to get shirt/pin/sticker of your dreams in place of a girlfriend this season!

HELLO EVERYONE! I’m so excited to introduce you to this years new crop of Autostraddle merch just in time for the holidays! We have new versions of old classics like the You Do You Tee, and the Scissoring Sweatshirt. There’s also brand-spanking new merch, like pronoun stickers with a dreamy vapor wave finish, QUEER MAGNETIC POETRY hand-crafted by Autostraddle writers and staff, and beautiful handmade face masks! As always, your merch purchase will help us continue to exist. Buy something for you, your pod friends, your girlfriend, your ex girlfriend, your byofriend, your mom who’s secretly gay, your best friend who you’re secretly gay for, and your polycule and your cuticles.

XS-3XL

Reprinted for a reason! The reason is that y’all love it and so do we! (Also the other reason was you voted for it in this poll to bring back a vintage Autostraddle Tee). This super soft tee is printed on 100% ring spun cotton.

S-2XL

Cozy as fuck and just waiting for you. Printed on a heavyweight, pigment-dyed sweatshirt.

XS-4XL

Oh I’m sorry, do you already have enough t-shirts with THEY printed right across the front? Well then I guess you won’t be needing this perfect rendition! Printed on super soft, tri blend fabric.

XS-4XL

The perfect tee for anybody who loves running around the park with a group of wild lesbians. Printed on super-soft, 100% ring spun cotton.

Scissoring Sticker — For anyone who knows there’s all this fun to be had, if we just believe in ourselves. 3″x2″. Printed on glowy, satin finish Vapor Wave paper.

Read a Fucking Book Sticker — Truly what the fuck else are you doing with your weekends this year?? 2″x2″. Printed on durable matte vinyl that’s UV protected and waterproof.

Hot Take Sticker — You’re full of them, the hot takes. Just be honest about it. 3″x2″. Printed on durable matte vinyl that’s UV protected and waterproof.

Queerdo Sticker — It’s you, you’re the queerdo. 2″x2″ Printed on a shimmery, shiny vinyl.

Who All’s Gay Here Sticker — For when you’re fresh out of time to fuck around. 3.5″ x 2″. Printed on durable matte vinyl that’s UV protected and waterproof.

Gender Traitor Sticker — Gay. 2″x2″. Printed on a fluorescent neon pink sticker paper that reacts to black light.

Pronoun Stickers — Each sticker is 2″ tall and printed on glowy, satin finish Vapor Wave paper.

Autostraddle’s first magnetic poetry kit! 330 VERY GAY WORDS to express your tender, horny, poetic heart.

Masks for your queer gay face in six bold prints illustrated by Maanya Dhar, Ren Strapp and Rohama Malik; lovingly handmade by Jess Sheeran. They feature a filter pocket, are fully adjustable and tie behind the head. 100% cotton and machine washable.

To get your deliveries in time for the holidays make sure to place your order by

📦 12/15 — USPS Retail Ground Service*
📦 12/18 — First-Class Mail Service*
📦 12/19 — Priority Mail Service*
📦 12/23 — Priority Mail Express Service*

* These dates are for domestic orders–we have no guarantee for international orders ♡

Conceptual Ideas / Riese + Sarah Sarwar
Designers / Sarah Sarwar, Rory Midhani, Alex Vega + Erin
Illustrators / Betty Turbo, Maanya Dhar, Ren Strapp, Rohama Malik and Aubrey Casazza
Printing / Hello Merch, Spoonflower, Sticker Ninja + US Magnetix