Quiz: Plan a Murder Mystery Party and I’ll Tell You What Type of Wife Guy You Are

In honor of television’s top Wife Guy Jeff Sadecki being back on our televisions for the second season of Yellowjackets, I, with the help of some dear friends, came up with this personality quiz, which will tell you exactly what style of Wife Guy you are in your heart. Let me be clear: The term “Wife Guy” for our purposes is both complimentary and gender neutral. You do not have to have a literal wife in order to exhibit the qualities of a Wife Guy. You do not even need to be in a relationship at all. This quiz will simply tell you about the Wife Guy energy you bring to the table and perhaps can be applicable to non-romantic relationships, like the way you ride for your bestie or would physically fight someone on the behalf of your dog. What we’re really psychoanalyzing here is your propensity for loyalty, partnership, and devotion.

Why a murder mystery party? Because it sounded fun! And because, as my friend pointed out, there are lots of trust exercises necessarily baked into the concept of a murder mystery. Let’s have some murdery fun!

First, pick a Murder Mystery Box!(Required)

What is the key to a successful murder mystery party?(Required)

Complex rules.

Good costumes.

Good acting.

Equal participation from all parties.

Genuine frights.

Funny friends.

A good menu.

Good decor.

How are you inviting friends to your murder mystery party?(Required)

Sending them a text

A mysterious email

An elaborate on-theme invitation in the mail

Paperless Post

Singing Telegram

With a vague invitation that does not say anything about it being a murder mystery party

With a gift basket of on-theme treats and booze

In person the next time you see them

How would your friends react to you inviting them to a murder mystery party?(Required)

They know your costume is gonna be on point.

They’re excited, because you throw great parties.

They are not surprised. They’re used to you having a theatrical flair.

They ask what they can bring.

They’re surprised. This isn’t something you’d usually host.

They’re nervous, because you tend to get competitive for any games.

They know the menu is gonna be good.

They assume this is actually your partner’s idea.

What IS on the menu?(Required)

Just drinks.

It’s Bring Your Own Snacks.

A charcuterie spread.

Pizza.

Martinis & Hot Dogs.

Burgers on the grill.

Several courses of on-theme food.

Just desserts.

What drinks are you serving?(Required)

It’s BYOB.

Champagne.

Fancy tea.

Something for everyone, including plenty of nonalcoholic options.

A homemade clarified milk punch.

Assorted beers.

Classic cocktails.

Wine.

Where are you going for party decor?(Required)

Garage sale.

You already own it.

Thrift Stores.

Party City.

Your parents’ attic.

Online.

A year-round Halloween/spooky store.

Target.

What murder mystery character that I just made up sounds like someone who you’d wanna play?(Required)

Jean McQueen - a high-rolling card shark who likes to take risks

Tracy Trick - a nosy reporter with something to prove

Stacey Starling - a dreamy movie star with a sordid past

Earnest Everyman - just a nice guy in a nice hat

Darlene Daring - a sharp-tongued MILF and heiress to a fortune

Butch Slicker - an androgynous early 20th century speakeasy owner with a dark secret

Chef Charlene - a dazzling and ruthless chef whose secret ingredient is danger

Logan Lowcountry - a handsome fisherman with a love for the open sea

What’s your general approach to your costume for the party?(Required)

Just buying it from a costume store online.

Buying it at a costume store.

Thrifting various pieces with an emphasis on authenticity.

Wearing things you already own.

Waiting until the last minute to pull it together but somehow still pulling it off.

Phone a femme for help.

Sewing or making various pieces.

Going shopping with your partner.

What do you hope is the overall vibe of the party?(Required)

Chaotic.

Horny.

Dramatic.

You just hope everyone has a nice time.

Scary.

Fun and silly.

Good food, good drinks, good times.

Memorable and cozy.

What character-defining accessory does your character wear?(Required)

A large hat.

A garter.

A statement necklace.

A handkerchief.

A monocle.

A nice watch.

A ring with a secret compartment.

A boutonniere.

Where are you hosting the party?(Required)

In your backyard.

A hotel room.

An airbnb you rented.

At your own house.

At a campsite.

An outdoor garden you’ve rented.

A cabin you’re borrowing.

At a friend’s house.

What do you hope people leave the party with?(Required)

Drama.

A new crush.

Good photos.

The party favors you made.

Nightmares.

Good stories.

Leftover food.

Happy memories.

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