Kristen Stewart Spotted Walking Alone; Stop the Presses

It’s been an odd couple of months for Kristen Stewart. First, she quietly broke up with live-in gal pal Alicia Cargile in a move so subtle it took the tabloids months to actually notice. Shortly thereafter, she started dating Soko, a musician and actress who has been very open about their relationship in interviews and on social media — much moreso than Kristen.

For a couple of days, the paparazzi were obsessed with everything they did, be it holding hands on the streets of Paris or sucking one another’s thumbs in the parking lot of a sandwich shop in Los Angeles. Since then, reports of the pair’s daily exploits have mostly dried up, but the tabloids have not stopped crafting stories from what limited information we already have. According to several reports, Stewart was seen by herself somewhere in Beverly Hills, which multiple gossip websites took as proof that Stewart and Soko have already called it quits. Some took it even further and claimed that Robert Pattinson was getting ready to/had already left FKA Twigs, and that the Twilight stars intended to rekindle their romance. Again, this all happened because Kristen Stewart was spotted walking somewhere by herself. Being famous is wild.

In this month’s edition of French Marie Claire, alleged sapphist and Broody McBrooderson Kristen Stewart discussed her extremely busy and extraordinarily productive year and her experiences with the pressures of fame. Although the translation is a bit confusing, it’s clear that Kristen continues to abhor the paparazzi and tabloid journalism in general (sorry, Kristen). When asked if there’s anywhere she can go on Earth where she wouldn’t be recognized, she reluctantly admits, “Fuck no.” Public scrutiny has led to Stewart becoming a bit paranoid, constantly worrying whether or not someone is eavesdropping on her private conversations.

While she was happy to tell the reporter that her favorite thing about acting was the ability to connect with others, she also said that she hates talking about fame — “There’s not much to say about it, and no one wants to hear you whine about your job, especially when so many people aspire to become actors.” Mostly, the journalist seemed to focus on Kristen’s recent shorter haircut, and whether or not she was still capable of “expressing femininity.” Additionally, when the reporter asked Stewart if it was harder in Hollywood to be black, gay or a woman, she replied, “I don’t have much experience with these subjects, I don’t have much to say.” There are certainly worse ways to answer that question, although also arguably there are better.

Anyway, here we are again, gossiping about how much Kristen Stewart hates being gossiped about. As far as we know, she still has a girlfriend and they’re still getting weird all over LA. We can’t wait to see what those two crazy kids get into next.